Tips for Couples on Valentine’s Day

Earlier this month, we talked about tips for people who are single on Valentine’s Day. This can be a tough time of the year to fly solo, but Valentine’s Day isn’t necessarily a walk in the park for couples either. This holiday can place a lot of pressure on couples to celebrate in a specific way, make a big to-do out of their relationship, and really deliver an Instagram-worthy couple experience. That’s a lot. If you find yourself struggling or feeling unnecessary pressure this Valentine’s Day, take a deep breath. In this blog, we’re going to talk about some ways you can emphasize creating a more loving and fulfilling relationship and alleviate some of the pressure surrounding Valentine’s Day. 

1 – Don’t Put all Your Eggs in One Basket

If Valentine’s Day is the only day of the year that you and your partner go out on dates or give each other romantic gifts, it’s easy to place really high expectations on this one day. Instead of going all out on Valentine’s Day, make more time to spend together and celebrate your partnership throughout the year, so Valentine’s Day doesn’t feel so important. 

2 – Give the Gift of Quality Time

Many people focus on gift giving at Valentine’s Day, so if you’re not able to give your partner an expensive or elaborate gift, it can feel like you’re letting them down. Instead of gifts this Valentine’s Day, consider giving each other something more meaningful – time. Spend some quality time together with all the devices powered off. 

3 – Communicate More Openly 

Communication is one thing that even the happiest couples can struggle with. On Valentine’s Day, spend some time talking openly about your goals and desires, or just take a deep dive into the minutiae of your frustrating day at work. Share whatever feels natural. Then, make a plan to spend more time year-round communicating openly. 

4 – Start a Tradition

Traditions are what bring our loved ones and families closer together during holidays. We talk a lot about traditions with holidays like Christmas and Thanksgiving. Think of some of your family’s holiday traditions and why they’re so special to you. Creating relationship traditions related to Valentine’s Day is a great way to develop deeper intimacy and create a meaningful, long-lasting connection with your partner. This doesn’t have to be anything elaborate. You can write each other notes every year or cook a meal together. Just a small way of celebrating your relationship, remembering the past, and looking forward to the future together. 

5 – Consider Therapy 

If you’re struggling in your relationship, Valentine’s Day may create added pressure that exacerbates existing difficulties. Therapy can be beneficial for individuals and couples who want to work through relationship struggles. I’m Ashley Pichardo, a licensed mental health counselor in New York. I typically offer individual therapy, but I also include partners in therapy sessions when it can benefit my clients. If you’re interested in learning more, don’t hesitate to reach out.